Tak sangka dalam mase sekelip mata bulan puasa dh dtg melawat kembali.Again I meet my favourite month of the year and to Ramadhan I say 'Ahlan Wasahlan'.I love Ramadhan for many different reason.

I love it because it has the potential of being a month that provides me food.LOts and lots of food.

I love it because it brings back the best memory I have.My best childhood moments were in Ramadhan.Terawikh ngan Kak ama.Bukak pose kat masjid ngan mummy and nad.

Now that I'm all grown up(hahahhahaha) I love Ramadhan for two very different reason.

I love Ramadhan because I now know what ukhwah means.What it means when you have sisterly bond thats not because of blood.Me n Nad,we never can get along quite well.Maybe its the age difference,maybe its just me being bekeng and she being really rebellious about the way i treat her mase kecik.BUt here in Auckland,MashaAllah the love I feel,I cannot even start to describe.

I also love Ramadhan now because its a platform.Its a way to get me near to Allah.I mean,yes,start puking now.Farah dah seriously lost it.I can just imagine people saying this sentence when I tell them.Rolling their eyes.Gone.Gone.She;s gone all hypocritical on us.

Well,so what.I've been fighting this whole hypocrite feeling I have in my head every single day .I I'm a hypocrite.Bile I dengan de 'akak's I feel that I wanna do good but when I ngan my other frens,I laugh,I jump I swear like a plumber and I feel goood.Well,this is where Ramadhan comes and play a role.This is the month where I know Allah's given me the 22nd chance at Iman.A chance at 'Taqwa'.

Yesterday,dengar Kak nana bg tazkirah.die kate siape yg buat2 baik depan kawan2 yg buat bek and buat jahat bile they turn their back is munafik.I recoiled at that word.Ya Allah.Aku golongan tu ke?I'm the enemey in de selimut?Here let me tell u I was shaking.Shaking at the thought that maybe smue ibadah yg I buat,smue x diterime.HOw am I supposed to know that I didnt do it because I was being riak.Baca Quran,mathurat tu semua?Wud i Really be doing it kalau i duduk sorang on an Island tanpe orang.How honest are my payers and my recitations?How honest am I with Allah?


I love Ramadhan because of one other reason.


It reminds me that Allah sees everything.Everthing.He knows the deepest deepest darkest secret you have.Everything you are.So a very big reminder to self.Fight that feeling yg u nk buat bek bile u dgn orang bek jer.REmind urself that U xkan dihisab dlm groups when u dekat Padang Mahsyar.There's not gonna be a 5 orang beriman so one bad fren gets to go the heaven discount.So here I angkat tangan and berdoa that this 22nd chance I get in Ramadhan I use the best I can.
Pray for me will yOU?


Yours honestly,

Farah humbled Hani.


W

bloggy land

seriously.i like this blog.i like writing and i have loved writing and expressing feeling since i was a like a fetus or something.therefore it really is very sad that the only form of emotional chanel that i can put to use is this blog yet i fail to use it fullY.therefore new year resolution to write more in the blog.


happY new year to y'all btw.my year has been kick ass.not.its normal as usual.on good side,my cooking skills are more sharpened thanks to maid duty i do twice a day.however its still never going to be served for those without matching gens.gross thing happened todaY.nearly swallowed a fly that was in somebody's left milo.hell,it was kind of my fault but god was that horrible.i was like so close to chewing it and just letting it pass my trakea-god,even after all the brushing and the mouth rinse i use,and all the unsuccesful gag tries-i feel the fly still left like some gross dirty bacteria in my mouth that can only be cleaned if bleach is used.

however,it may come as a surprise to many ppl(or it mite not) that i have tried far worse and grosser food staples in my life.lets review my top two grossest food ive eaten

1.chicken head.yep.i did.one time,enjoying indonesian rendang and cudnt see which part of the chicken the meat came from since theyre basically covered in gravy so just went on to eat and eat the food till i felt something pop in my mouth and everything became a bit gelled.immediately spitted it out(who cares about manners then when u felt goo in ur mouth) and saw that it was an eye ball.a black eyeball which was now inflated with its liquid mixed with rice and gravy that i have chewed on.yeah.it put me of chicken rendang for like atleast a year.

2.goat's testicles(balls)
this one is courtesy of my moM.apparently some folk lore said that to stop siblings from fighting(and owh,me n my sibs fought a lot-punches fly every 5 second),give them a serving of testicle and she tried it.the worst part was that she had to trick us into eating it.i mean no daughter or son in their right mind would volunterily eat that with consent.she cut the tescticles to look like squid pieces and told us all that it was some fancy deep sea squids that she bought especially for us.and we all,being squabblers of course fought over who got to eat more.now only do i understand the smirk my moM and dad had while watching us eat those boy goat parts.it didnt really make us love each other instantly,but it does scare us into being nicer to each other when in front of my mom since you never know when she decides that its time to try the recipe again and slip into our food with another delicacy claiM^^^

yeah.thats it it.im queen gross
maybe i'll try a grasshopper next time which my dad swears is delicious and is as good as chicken meat which i very much doubt

till next time
on the next mission to accidentally eat more vile food